If your write it...

Long time...

Mon, 17 Dec 2007 04:08:00 GMT

I know it has been forever since my last post. Guess that means I have been busy. Can be a good thing.
Well I am surviving. I am happy even tho I am as broke as can be. I hope to start waitressing again next week so that I can start to pay the bills again. My mom has been off work since last October so it has been verry tuff at home. My personal plans have been put on hold even longer because of that. But hey, you gotta help family when you can. Not that I have been able to do much.

I just love being here watching my niece and nephew grow up. Now and then my niece will say something cute and the rest of us will lol! For example: We were gettin ready to leave and she was headed to the door and said "vamonos!" She says the funniest things. Then she was part of a x-mas program at a church in town, she turned to the little girl next to her and took her hands and started to do the motions for the songs they were singing. Then she tapped the little boy next to her on the shoulder when he was bent down to tie his shoes, he is 3 and didn't know how to that, neither does my niece. She tied them in knots for him. We got it on video.
My nephew is so damn cute! He loves his auntie. He smiles at me all the time. He does this growl/grunt thing and stiffens his body. I growl back at him and we go back and forth till one of us laughs. He is trying to crawl but so far has only found "scoot" "drag forward" and "reverse." Oh and if he wants to get anywhere quickly then he rolls to it. Very amusing to watch on the kitchen floor.

I survived my first ice storm and had fun trying to drive my car on ice. We were going down a small hill and hit solid ice so that when I tried to stop, we slid. I turned my wheel and did a 90degree turn. Cones were in the road so we didn't have much choice but to turn. We had to go up a steep hill and since we didn't have much momentum we slid down a bit. We came to a stop and my mom sugests that I go down the hill in reverse. I could hardly see out the front or back windows as it was so I started the car rolling backwards and made it slide doing a 180 so that we were facing the direction we were sliding. That was FUN! Scared the chit out of my mom who had insisted we try to get back to the house to check on the dogs. When we tried to go up the hill and started to slide backwards, we knew our only choice was to go back to her mom's and stay another night. She had started to suggest to go another way then thought about it. The dogs would be fine.
I made it out in the morning and found we had no water as well. Thought the pipes had froze but as it turned out it was that the well had no power. We were glad for that bc that ment that our pipes wouldn't freeze and we won't have that mess to clean up. So many tree branches had broken off. The property was a mess. Still is. Gonna be a while to get it all cleaned up.

Well enough for now. Hope everyone has happy holidays and safe travels.

for chits and giggles

Wed, 26 Sep 2007 01:14:51 GMT

www.nikolaisen.org/misc/pointless.html

..........nuf said

Thu, 19 Jul 2007 19:37:03 GMT

Ok, ok. I will keep this one too. I will stay. Hope all is well for my friends in lj world.

Tue, 17 Jul 2007 20:09:34 GMT

I am thinking about closing my lj account. I only get on here once in a while as it is. I would rather just do a myspace blog.

Well it's a thought at least.

Mon, 16 Jul 2007 22:17:54 GMT

Well Thursday was intresting. My mom and I went horse back riding with the neighbor. I used a kids saddle. I have gained weight since I have been here but not in my butt, I guess. Now I know you are picturing a small saddle. The girl used it when she was 9-13ish. It was rather comfy.
Now comes the fun. The girl wanted to run her horse and mom and I said go ahead. We can handle our horses. So she ran and then so did we. I did well enough. My mom realized that the stirups were a bit too long for her. None of us fixed it at the time. Stupid, stupid.
Next time we all ran I pulled in a little early and watched my mom get thrown. She hit hard and was up walking a few mins later. My sister came to us with the truck and followed us and the horses home. I rode the horse that tossed her. Seems stupid too huh? well if I didn't then it would be harder to ride him next time. When we got home my mom got back on the horse and walked him in a circle. Then she got in his face and made sure he knew he didn't win.
She didn't break anything. Just a few bumps and bruises.
Well time to make dinner

Tue, 03 Jul 2007 21:06:39 GMT

Been here in Missouri for a while now and I am loving it. I may get to keep one of my mom's puppies. She said we'll see what happens. I think that means that it may be my birthday gift a little early. The one I have grown fond of is a black and red little girl. She is playfull and lovable. Too smart for her own good. I have been trying to play with all the puppies but....what am I to do when the one keeps comin back to me. Right now they are crying out in the dog house. I am sure they are just hot right now. It is one of those muggy hot days. Cold showers are wonderful til you get out.
The chickens crow most of the day here and they start at about 5:30am. It don't get dark till just b4 9pm. Long days short nights. I don't normally get to bed till at least midnight. Depends on work. I am now a waitress. I am done training. YEA! I get to keep my tips now!!!
Today is my moms birthday. We are cleaning house. Sounds fun right?

Let me tell you that storms out here are fun.

Wed, 06 Jun 2007 18:42:03 GMT

Rich is right. I do not wish him ill will. I love him too much for that. I will always think fondly of him. He taught me that their is more than one way to think and that people can change for the better. I will cling to that.

Rich,
If I could get past the tears I would tell you everything in my heart but I choke on the words for they never seem to be able to express how I feel. Oh so pretty are the words tho inadiquit they are.

Yes, it's true...

Mon, 28 May 2007 23:42:15 GMT

Some have asked if the rumors are true about me moving. Yes they are true. I am Moving to Missouri. My family has agreed to help me get on my feet and I will be helping them too. I went for a visit and to watch my nephew be born and let me tell you just how awesome that was!!! (or at least I would tell you if I could put such feeling into words) So yeah, I leave soon and I am not one for good-byes and stuff as they have a tendancy to make me want to change my mind and this is one of those times that I shouldn't change it. Several of my friends have done me favors and if I want to return them then I need to go. I have a choice of jobs waiting for me when I get there too so I won't be taking a week to do any searching.

The only thing I ask of you, my friends, is to take care of eachother. Don't worry so much about what you get out of helping eachother as the fact that you can help should be reward enough and you never know when one of your friends will win the lotto and think of you. After all, your friends are the family you get to choose.

I will be a few clicks away....and some day I shall be back.

Till then, I will miss all of you.

My journey awaits me........

Where is Lady Luck?

Sun, 01 Apr 2007 23:21:32 GMT

Things are changing. They are going to change fast. If I get just a little luck on my side then I will be able to help those who have helped me. I may explain more later. I may not. I may just act or show instead of just tell....you never know anymore....

and the winner is...

Sun, 01 Apr 2007 10:21:50 GMT

Love Revisited

I had fear in my heart
I let it rule me
When it came to my dreams
I let the words of others
Fill my mind with doubts
Telling me whats best
I took some quiet time
Listened to my own heart
Consulted the Goddess
About now and tomorrow

I found you still there
Deep and true you stayed
I want to be with you
Making our dreams come true
One day at a time
Side by side
Heart to heart

I am sorry I hurt you
What is done I can't undo
I can only promise
To share what's in my heart
Share what's on my mind
Give you everything I can
Without losing sight of me
Without losing sight of you

Loving you is where I want to be
The tears, the pain
The happieness again
The good, the bad
I want what we have had
Will you continue the love
Will you have me again, still?

Already Gone

Sun, 25 Mar 2007 02:48:15 GMT

I leave behind my scent on your sheets
The memory of my laughter when you'd tickle me
The quiet times together are no more to be
For I leave you now and forever more

In my heart I will keep the memory
Of a love found, unexpectedly
Of a life changed for eternity
I leave you now and forever more

I leave behind the smell of sex and purple lights
No more serous talks late into the night
No more looking into my eyes, my soul
For I leave you now and forever more

My tears leave trails on my face
I can't slow down my lifes pace
Nor can I ask for more of you
So I leave you now and forever more

Let Nighteyes protect your dreams at night
For I will not be there to hold you tight
As I rip my heart to pieces...

...I leave you now and forever more

comments are screened....

No, not here...

Tue, 13 Mar 2007 01:28:48 GMT

Life has been crapy. Been considering making major changes. I am no longer working for the mouse. I now work for AppleOne again. Hopefully I will be placed in a long term position. I can get benifits from Appleone so I may stay with them for a while.
I was taken to dinner and to see the movie 300 on Friday night. It was good. I really enjoyed the movie.
Now I am not feeling very chatty or social. I just want to go hide. I am tired of the way things have been.

Mon, 26 Feb 2007 01:58:06 GMT

So it's been a long while since I have posted. For good reason. The apt I live in has no internet and I have been more into just spending time with ppl rather than a box. I did manage to go to war with Mus and Michelle. It was Michelle insisting that I go, so much so that she paid for me to go and made sure I had food. Since I am only getting a few hours at work right now it was easy to get the time off of work. I am currantly looking for a full time full benifits job that I can enjoy. The Dept Mgr at my work said something about cross training and then that didn't happen. I was also told that I could get more hours in the park and then when I tried they told me that they have no hours to give. Disney is just not busy right now.

Life has been tuff of late. My grandpa just got back from visiting his brother. Not a good trip. His brother is full of cancer. They just put a bunch of tubes in him so as to make him a little more comfy. They don't think he has much longer. My grandparents are taking this hard emotionaly, as could be expected. I am glad my grandpa went to see him tho. They may not have been able to afford it since he hasn't been working since December. They only one able to work right now is my Aunt. That leaves my grandma home to take care of the kids. She is getting too old for that. So I am a little upset that they have it a bit tuff too. They moved out there so that it would be a little easier on them and yet it seems that things are just as hard as if they had stayed out here. I have considered going out there for a while. I just dont think I can leave here yet. Even if it were temporary.

Life has been good for my dad at least. The only downer on that one is that he seems to drink too much. I am actually glad he dont live closer. I would probably get late night visits from a drunk sorry father. I don't need those.

My sister is doing well. They are going to have a little boy! So it may be that they wind up only havin 2 kids but at least she will have one of each. Then again, she is stubborn, she may have another just because the doctor out here said she couldn't/shouldn't.

ick.....what a rant! and to think that didn't scratch the surface.

Thu, 01 Feb 2007 05:28:51 GMT

Height?
5'6"

2.Have you ever smoke heroine?
nope

3. Do you own a gun?
nope

5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments?
before my cancer no....now, a little bit, yes.

6. What do you think of hot dogs?
sour wennie gravy....

7. What's your favorite Christmas song?
don't have one

8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning?
depend on the morning...coffee or water normally

9. Can you do push ups?
Yes, not that many though

10. Is your bathroom clean?
mostly

11. What's your favorite piece of jewelry?
yellow LIVESTRONG band

12. Do you like painkillers?
only if it gets real bad

13.What is your secret weapon to lure in the opposite sex?
you tell me....

14. Do you have ADHD?
does it come in red?

16. Middle Name?
Leelynn

17. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment?
1. mmmm...ice cream
2. I miss my family
3. gots to poty...don't want to get up

18. Name the last 3 things you have bought?
1. Deodrant
2. Mouth wash
3. Mt. Dew

Name 3 drinks you regularly drink:
1. Water
2. Cherry Coke
3. Mt. Dew

22. Current worry?
How can I pay my debt with so few hours...

23. Current hate?
not having medical coverage, or dental, or vision

24. Favorite place to be?

25. How did you bring in the New Year?
With my boyfriend and his mother

26. Where would you like to go?
so many places....

27. Do you own slippers?
Yes and they are comfy

28. What shirt are you wearing?
Tan mock turtle neck

29. Do you burn or tan?
I burn the first time and then I tan

30. Favorite color(s)?
orange, green, red...ok so fire and earthy colors

31. Would you be a pirate?
you mean I am not?

33. What songs do you sing in the shower?
Andrea Boccelli or what ever comes on the radio

34. What did you fear was going to get you at night as a child?
shadow fingers...I was scared of the dark.

35. What's in your pockets right now?
they are empty for a change

36. Last thing that made you laugh?
Grandma answering phone saying " awe kitten, you always call when the litterbox is either full or dirty"

37. Best bed sheets as a child?
strawberry shortcake

38. Worst injury you've ever had?
slight concussion

40. How many TVs do you have in your house?
2. I don't watch either one. I use my computer to watch movies

41. Who is your loudest friend?
I would like to hold a contest for this title...

42. Who is your most silent friend?
Mus

43. Does someone have a crush on you?
Sure. I may even know the person....lol

44. Do you wish on shooting stars?
I haven't in some time...never came true anyways...

45. What is your favorite book?
Too many to choose from...

46. What is your favorite candy?
Fruit has been my candy of late

47. What song do/did you want played at your wedding?
"My Bestfriend" and it was played much later than I wanted.

48. What song do you want played at your funeral?
I have a choice?

49. What were you doing at 12:00 last night?
Watching Charmed with my eyes closed

50. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up?
oops...over slept

found a source of info...

Mon, 22 Jan 2007 01:19:26 GMT

http://www.templarhistory.com/index.html

Wed, 17 Jan 2007 23:02:49 GMT

YOU'RE ON MY FRIENDS LIST, I WANNA KNOW YOU...
I want to know 35 things about you. I don't care if we never talk, never liked eachother, or if we already know everything about each other. You're on mylist, so let me know who I am friends with.

REPLY IN A COMMENT, THEN REPOST THE EMPTY QUESTIONS AS A JOURNAL POST.

1. Can you cook?
2. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator?
3. What talent do you wish you had?
4. Favorite place?
5. Favorite vegetable?
6. What was the last book you read?
7. Are you Dirty or Clean?
8. Any Tattoos and/or Piercings?
9. Worst Habit?

HERE COMES THE FUN ... ... ...

1. Do we know each other outside of LiveJournal?
2. What's your philosophy on life?
3. Negative or Optimistic?
4. What was your dream growing up?
5. Worst thing to ever happen to you?
6. Would you give me money or a slap in the face?
7. Tell me one weird fact about you:
8. Would you have my back or kick me when I'm down?
9. Do you Trust me?
10. Have you ever kept anything from me?
11. What do you think of me as a Person?
12. Do you think I'm sane or insane?
13. Would you cry for me if I died?
14. Would you be my crime partner or my conscience?
15. If you could change anything about me, would you?
16. How do you fall asleep?
17. Would you come over to yell at me or just call?
18. Would you go on a blind date if I set you up?
19. If I only had one day to live would you be honest or lie?
20. A million bucks.. what would you do with it?
21. What is your worst fear?
22. Favorite thing to do in your spare time?
23. How many times did you curse at me while filling out this thing?
24. Can you sing or dance?
25. In one word, how would you describe me? Be honest....
26. Will you repost this so I can fill it out?

Bowling

Sun, 07 Jan 2007 01:14:20 GMT

So today I had bowling. I get to bowl again tomorrow night as per usual. We had 2 weeks off and that was why we bowled today. It was close each game. I didn't pay attention to my score till the 9th frame. If I look at it b4 that then I start doing crapy. So what did not looking at my score do for me today? Well let's see...I average about 153. Today I scored 162 188 189. Thant means my average will go up. If I had bowled closer to my average then we would have lost so it's a good thing I brought my "A" game. We won by one point. Now we are in a 3 way tie for first.
Fun. Fun. Fun.

Thu, 04 Jan 2007 02:47:19 GMT

And so my year starts off with a BANG! Looks like I get to move again. A new year, a new life, a new residence, and a new resolve. I will be more agressive with what things are in my control and try not to stress over those that are not in my control. I am tired of letting life beat me while I am down and letting others keep me there. I have tried to keep my head up when I am around people, I don't think I have always done a good job.
Life gets fustrating when you play the waiting game. I didn't know what I was going to do after I left my x untill I actually left him. Then things got a bit more focused. My clocks are ticking and I have semi-plans on what I want and when I want them. Again I must wait for the rest of life to catch up with me.
Now that I pulled my head out of my ass I will start to push ahead while taking time to smell the roses.

I worked 8 days in a row and just got my check for 7 of it. Damn! It's pretty! Too bad it's already spent on bills! Oh well, at least I can get a few things paid. Soon it is tax time....

....don't hate me for that. I planned ahead. Too bad I didn't plan so well for other things too...

Fri, 29 Dec 2006 02:08:06 GMT

So here comes the start of a new year. I have hopes that it will be better than the last. I will not recount what this last year held for me. If I posted it and you read it then it doesn't matter. If you didn't read it then it sitll don't matter.

X-Mas was different for me. It was the first year where I had nothing to give. That hurt so bad. Still I feel the pain.
My mother and brother-in-law left yesterday afternoon. The night b4, I went to say good bye. It was the first time that my brother-in-law told me he loved me. He has been family for some time now. It was a shock to hear such words spoken from him. That was the best gift he could have ever given me.
I had to work as Disney never closes. I worked on x-mas eve too. I worked in the park that day. It was cool.Short shift, not bad.

I am sickly now. Thankfully it is still just a head cold but tonight I will take Nyquil to make me sleep eariler and deeper. I am a med head now too.

We all make mistakes. This next year will be no different. I go into it knowing it will happen. Many wrongs have happened to good people and that too, will continue. What matters to me is that I survive, you survive. Injuries can heal with time. I hope to heal a few of those this year. Others I will allow to scar. A scar that is a reminder for lessons learned.

oy...

blah blah burp

Sun, 03 Dec 2006 06:01:41 GMT

Gee....it never seems to end.

So my sister is in the hospital and has been since Wednesday night. She was having ~~bad~~ pain in her left leg. She originally went in on Monday and they found nothing wrong. Wednesday they found a blood clot. They kept her and put her on blood thinners. She is about 15 weeks pregnant and is now considered a high risk pregnancy. The OB has stongly suggested to get her tubes tied after the baby is born. No more babies for my sister is what he says. She is getting another opinion. She may be allowed to go home on Monday. When she does leave she will have to give herseif injections till the baby is born. As some of you know her and my mom are moving back to MO after x-mas. They plan to drive out there. The doc said she needs to fly. Driving will be too stressful on my sister. Flying takes money they don't really have.

It always comes back to that green stuff.

Sometimes you find things out about your loved ones that you wish you didn't know. Sometimes you want to believe people change and stay that way. Doesn't always happen though. As is the case with my father. I thought he had changed and was staying that way. By his own admission, I now know otherwise. How do you tell your parents you are dissappointed in them?

The stress is starting to take it's toll on my body in several ways. Think I need to see a doctor.

Wow....

Sat, 18 Nov 2006 01:15:26 GMT

You are The Lovers

Motive, power, and action, arising from Inspiration and Impulse.

The Lovers represents intuition and inspiration. Very often a choice needs to be made.

Originally, this card was called just LOVE. And that's actually more apt than "Lovers." Love follows in this sequence of growth and maturity. And, coming after the Emperor, who is about control, it is a radical change in perspective. LOVE is a force that makes you choose and decide for reasons you often can't understand; it makes you surrender control to a higher power. And that is what this card is all about. Finding something or someone who is so much a part of yourself, so perfectly attuned to you and you to them, that you cannot, dare not resist. This card indicates that the you have or will come across a person, career, challenge or thing that you will fall in love with. You will know instinctively that you must have this, even if it means diverging from your chosen path. No matter the difficulties, without it you will never be complete.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

Wed, 06 Sep 2006 04:23:55 GMT

The music is flowing
The lyrics are sung
Yet all I hear
Is the silence of one

Alone in the dark
My time I bide
The truth, from myself
I cannot hide

Gee.... I wonder how that can be taken....

meeeww

Wed, 16 Aug 2006 06:42:52 GMT

You Are A: Kitten!

Cute as can be, kittens are playful, mischevious, and ever-curious. Your mischevious side is part of what makes you a kitten, as is your dislike of getting wet! Kittens are often loving, but are known to scratch or bite when annoyed. These adorable animals are the most popular pets in the United States--37% of American households have at least one cat. Whether it is your gentle purr or your disarming appearance, you make a wonderful kitten.

You were almost a: Monkey or a Squirrel
You are least like a: Turtle or a Duckling What Cute Animal Are You?

and I didn't even try....

Tue, 15 Aug 2006 19:22:49 GMT

You scored as Kiss. You are KISS, Rock on.

</td>

Rush

75%

Kiss

75%

Bad Company

69%

Lynyrd Skynrd

63%

Queen

56%

Led Zeppelin

56%

The Who

50%

Bob Marley

44%

KC and the Sunshine Band

31%

Pink Floyd

31%

What 70's rock band are you?
created with QuizFarm.com

Mon, 31 Jul 2006 07:16:02 GMT

If You Ruled the Land . . . by wackyweasel

Your first name:

How you gained your rule:

Your title is:

Great and Merciful Ruler of All the Land

Your symbol is:

the tiger, because you are great at hide-n-seek-n-pounce!

You rule from:

a great, red and gold palace gaurded by a dragon

At your side is:

your griffon steed, Simba

Your enforcers, troops, and guards are all:

elvin archers with fairy wings

Your most popular law is:

No-pants Fridays

Your least popular law is:

Pinky swearing equals a binding contract

Your worst enemy is:

the one that got away!

Your popularity rating is:: 56%

Your chance of being overthrown is:: 59%

Quiz created with MemeGen!